the story of the random party to be

22 Apr
tomorrow calls for nice weather. my original plan was to go the work meeting and then just hang out… that is until i came home one day, got to talking to Mike and he was like
"by the way… people are coming over on Sundayfor a BBQ"
me: "how many?"
Mike: " about 10?"
me: "you do realize that my BBQ can do like 2 burgers at a time… at most"
Mike: "thanks for telling me NOW"
me: "well i guess you’re just gonna have to buy a BBQ hmm?"
Mike: "grumble"
so today as i was coming home from the mall i called Mike to see if he wanted to go to Loblaws to pick up some stuff for the impromptu deck party/BBQ that is to go down tomorrow. so he said yes because he needed bread. we go towards the doors and i point out the plastic patio chairs and mention that we might possibly need some. my lawnchair, plus two folding chairs plus the deck stairs apparently isn’t enough seating accomadations so we end up grabbing like 4 of them. i decide that it will be best if we cram them into a shopping cart for ease of movement around the store. already we are getting funny looks trying to cram the chairs into the cart. right inside the doors they have summer stuff on display. i sarcastically point at the BBQs and sarcastically say "there’s your BBQ". next thing i know, i’m circling the damn thing helping determine if it is good enough. this one being the most expensive one on display. just when we decided that it was good, i found a flyer about the BBQs and saw that there was an even more expensive one. but we couldn’t find it in the pile of boxes for the life of us. so Mike went to customer service to ask about it… leaving me just standing there with a cart full of chairs in front of the take-out area, off to "hassle" anyone he could find. the guy he did find, as he told me later, told him that the BBQ that he saw on display and planned on buying was way too much and the only time you would need it would be if you were to roast an entire cow. so Mike shot back by pointing at the super expensive one that wasn’t even in stock and saying "so this one would be if you wanted to roast two cows?". i laughed so hard when he told me. so we continued on through the store. at some point early on, Mike stopped for a second and started circling around me with the cart while we argued over whether or not we should buy potatoes to make potato wedges. then we went looking for meat, which is afterall the main ingredient in a successful BBQ-houseparty. first we went and looked at the pre-made frozen stuff. but Mike thought it would be better to buy freshly made burger patties from the deli. so i joyrided on the cart over there. then the guy was like "no we don’t make those here. you should get the pre-made ones" and Mike asked if they could make them for us. and the guy was like, "if you don’t mind my asking, what’s wrong with the frozen ones?" at which point we walked away. then the free samples lady scolded us for dropping out of school. then we couldn’t find the potato wedges [at this point we had decided on pre-made frozen ones… we are just that damn lazy]… so i climbed on the front of the cart, facing Mike and he ran down the aisle… and just about plowed down an old man and just about rammed me into his cart… my poor poor heart was beating uncontrollably fast at this point, but we just looked at each other and giggled meniacally.
at the check-out, while the chick was figuring out how to key in the purchase of a BBQ [Mike was buying it all at once!!], Mike turns to me and he says: "i forgot to buy bread". i groan and look at him while trying to hold down laughter. eventually i crack and run to the opposite end of the store [diagonally i might add] grab the bread and run back. the whole time i am running and dodging people left and right. when i get back, no progress other than Mike and the cashier discussing methods of getting the BBQ home. she suggested taking a cab lol. as soon as i catch my breath i realize that i forgot to get salad dressing and i tell Mike, and we giggle. the cashier looks at me and tells me which aisle its in followed by "you’ve got enough time". so i take off, again, running like a madwoman through the aisles of Loblaws dodging people and at the same time trying to pull my shirt down because it is rolling up as i run.
fast forward to us at the front of the store, looking at the giant box that the BBQ is in and back at each other then at the shopping cart full of groceries and chairs. no idea how to get this all home, Mike asks the guy if he wouldn’t mind helping us take home. he seems unsure and asks his manager who just happened to walk in at that moment. after about 5 minutes of debating about what to do, and realizing that there is no room in a cab for all our stuff and realizing how damn close we live. the manager guy tells us its ok if we take the carts, he would rather lose the carts than his employee. so there we are, two carts full of stuff, slowly making our way down the street. laughing at the fact that every time we throw a party we end up having to steal or in this case "steal" shopping carts [we now have 3 Loblaws carts in the garage] just to haul all the stuff that we buy [which both times seems to have been chairs of some sort lol]. finally get we to out driveway and then we realize that we can’t get the cart with the unassembled-BBQ-in-a-box up over the curb and onto our driveway. we debate over whether or not we should just go over the grass and straight into the backyard. and of course that idea gets shut down. i attempt to help him lift the box. no go. back to "debating". stil no go on my around the backyard over the grass idea. which even the neighbour from across the street suggested, we both get shut down with "it’ll ruin the grass" from Mike. so the neighbour offers us the help of someone who i assume to be her son. we get the BBQ in the house… right in the living room. Connie and Mike decide to empty the box right on the living room floor. i look inside the box and see the instruction so i climb in… its a nice fit. so i get comfy and sit in there, next thing i know, they’ve flipped the box right side up. and i am on my back with my legs sticking up in the air over the edge of the box… still relatively comfy though. but the camera batteries were dead so no pic. but then i broke the corner edge of the box while trying to get out… it really was the only way out i might add.
together we managed to get a propane tank back to the house. but along the way back we had to stop at Loblaws again so i could buy some jello. i left Mike in the front entrance part with the propane tank. [the whole time in the parking lot we got weird looks]. once i found the jello i went back to the same cashier for a laugh, but eventually had to go over to the next line because it was taking too long.
we did end up assembling the BBQ without too many injuries, aside from a few mashed fingers and some things dropped on feet. and a few things improperly screwed together which we then had to use our universal tool to unpry. in the end it was well done. then we made burgers, from scratch. we had some ground beef. it was frozen so we had to defrost it, and eventually we just started adding stuff to it. like cheese and garlic and seasonings and beer. they actually came out as the best burgers we have ever had. they didn’t even need condiments. even Connie was like "these are the best burgers i have had in years" or something to that extent. with the burgers all cooked and eaten it was time to get started on the jello shooters for tomorrow nights party. by batch number 3 i was out of shooter cups. it was 9:30pm and i was determined to finish what i had started. so me and Mike [i convinced him to tag along] had to run out to Loblaws [my third trip there in one day]. i just went straight to the first person i could find who worked there and straight out asked where i could find jello shooter cups. all i could find in the aisle where they sent me was 3oz paper cups to keep in the bathroom? i grabbed a box and went on through the store still searching. after that all i found was shot glass sets… no good. then me and Mike ran into the guy who had helped us with the BBQ and he asked how it was doing. we laughed. next thing i knew, Mike was buying a deep fryer. ergo we needed oil. so off we ran, looking for a huge ass container of cooking oil. at this point i was referring to everything as "huge ass". i looked at the deep fryer and thought to myself "i’ll be damned, i needa buy some Mars bars to deep fry". and so i did… somehow i also ended up grabbing a 2L of Dr Pepper because apparently the almost full one i had in the fridge just wasn’t enough?!
oh crap!!! i forgot about my ice!!! CRAP CRAP CRAP!! need… more… ice….

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